Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?

– Danielle LaPorte

Well, can you? These words, so thought-provoking, always get me. They prompt me to consider how easily others’ desires and cultural expectations, no matter how well-intentioned, can seep through the fabric of the unique lives God has given us, altering their colors and changing the look of their patterns. And they are a reminder of how challenging it can be to see beyond those marks, especially when they come from painful pasts!

Each of us has our own journey to wash out such stains, and to see beyond not only what others say to us, but also what we say to ourselves about who we are. Each of us is responsible for cleaning out the gardens of our lives, and discovering what beauty lies beneath the weeds and debris. It is not an easy task: as humans, we are always telling ourselves stories about our lives, based both on what others have told us and what we have perceived.

This is a powerful thing that we do, and it can have many reverberations, for better or for worse. Because those stories become our realities, and are often compelling enough that we either ignore or forget the God-given truth that was planted in our hearts long ago. We listen to the stories, because they are loud and hypnotic–or worse, because they have become the normal voices in our heads.

The beauty of the truth becomes, strangely enough, terrifying to look at directly.

What is that truth? That each one of us is enough as we are. That each one of us is loved completely as we are.

What story have you believed about who you are? And, more than that, whose story? Because if you’ve bought into anything that isn’t God’s truth for you, it is certainly going to prove to be troublesome–if not now, then later. Soon. Down the road, but before you know it.

My own experiences have told me as much: I have been many different versions of myself. I have pursued many different supposed passions. In reality, though, there has always been something certain that the Holy Spirit placed within me, and my avoiding it has caused grief.

There is nothing wrong with experimentation and individuation, but ultimately, when God tells you who you are, to not listen is to reject something very special.

For my own personal example, what I am doing right now–writing–is part of me, and of what I am made to do, because the Spirit has placed within me a drive to speak the truth that is love through words. This compulsion tells me a great deal about myself. That’s worth a lot.

I am certain that you, too, have (one or two or five) certain somethings like this, that magnetically compel and draw you for reasons you cannot entirely explain outside of their being part of your core motivation for living. Whether that something is caring for children, painting, cooking, designing business strategies, or being a wellspring of encouragement, it is not to be ignored. It is to be embraced!

God’s Design For You

Embracing and understanding these core motivations provides us with certain clues about what we’re made and meant for. They highlight our spiritual gifts, and offer truths about our potential. What is it that drives you, that makes you angry, that lights you up? What is it you desperately want others to know?

That God is real and present?

That His truth is accessible?

That His love is everywhere?

Question yourself, and find out. It will put you on a path toward the way you can most completely bring more light into the world. It will bring you closer to your purpose, and make you excited to wake up in the morning. To be present. To be alive.

As Graham Cooke puts it in one of his brilliant (yes, yes, pun intended) articles:

“You must think for yourself. To do that effectively you must have an understanding of who you are personally in Christ. If you have no understanding of the meaning and purpose for your own life, you cannot affect anything long-term. What you think must be written down first. Then you must use it to pray, ponder and plan your way.”

Maybe the road you originally chose for your journey has had to change. Maybe you’ve been moved in ways you never could have imagined. Maybe this is the perfect time to stop, take stock of where you are, and reflect on where you’ve been. And more than that, to look for your truest self in the midst of everything that is around you. Maybe you are exactly where you are supposed to be, and God can use that to move you toward your purpose, starting now.